Updates in Life

So its been some time since i moved into the new place.I've got a nick in life[finally] i am referred to as 'John' nowadays.As in John Abraham.Now please don't get any thoughts of me having a build like him[which would be flattering me a lot] or that i have his acting skills[which would be insulting me].The nick just refers to the well rounded belly i have developed over the two years i have stayed here.

Also i've had my introduction to the much hyped mr.alcohol thanks mostly to the tireless persuasion from navin and thyiga[there are rumors that this guy has sold his soul to the devil - what with the multiple girlfriends and all - and in repayment makes more introductions of mr alcohol to innocent people like me].The first experience was good.Let us see where it leads us to.

Liverpool have purchased Glen Johnson for a cool 17.5 million.Even though i am against the price,It seems that the deal was 10million + the seven million owed to us in the Crouch deal.Also according to the new Champions League rules we need more British players in the team.And he had a decent season with Portsmouth and it looks like we selling arbeloa to Real Madrid so it is fine on the whole.Even better one of the bastard owners has sold his NHL team and our future looks a lot better now.Not so for the hated Red Devils whose ever mounting debt threatens to swallow all the 80 million paid for Ronaldo.Hehehehehehe.

IIM-K sprung a surprise and offered an admission.I am rejecting it in the hope that something better happens next year.As the Architect says "Hope, it is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and your greatest weakness."Lets see what happens.

Top Liverpool Moments EPL 08-09

1.ManU 1 -4 Liverpool
Beating Fergie's team at Old Trafford and so comprehensively.They were so shaken up after the match that they forgot how to win for the next few matches.And to top it all,Dossena scored again.

2.Chelsea 0-1 Liverpool
Ending Chelsea's unbeaten home record and showing the rest of the world how to counter scolari's team.They were being praised for their attacking football till then,once rafa showed the way scolari's fate was sealed.

3.Liverpool 4-0 Real Madrid
Liverpool were irresistable on the night.One more legendary European night at Anfield.

4.Liverpool 5-0 Aston Villa
Accepted Villa's form had not been that great at the time,but to beat the 5th placed team so comprehensively and with a Gerrard hat-trick is just too good.

5.Newcastle 1-5 Liverpool
Gerrard was given a standing ovation by the Geordies when he was subbed.Dont see that happen usually.Liverpool showed that they were easily the best footballing team in the country.

6.Sami Hyppia's Retirement
The reception that Sami got in the final match was touching.Huge flags in his name,the hyppia songs and the flying header.Unforgettable.

7.Gerrard winning the Writers Award
Gerrard wins the football writers player of the year award.23 goals and 9 assists.Beat that if you can.

8.Chelsea 4-4 Liverpool
No Gerrard,Torres not fully fit? no problem.Liverpool were a goal away from qualification with eightminutes to go.One of the best matches of the season.This match forced Hiddink to go on the defensive for the semis.

9.Liverpool 4-0 Blackburn
Big Sam came to match claiming Liverpool his team could beat Liverpool.After the match forced to accept Liverpool were too good for his team.Add a stunning goal by Torres,delicious.

10.Liverpool 2-1 ManU
Beating the hated rivals after four years was sweet.To have Vidic sent off and see a O Shea own goal oh yes.

KKR Jokes

The joke is clearly on KKR this IPL season so some i could contribute.

Sprite has decided to release a new ad featuring SRK and Buch. Buch is shown training Ganguly and McCullum when SRK walks in.
He asks Buch "Ye Sab kiskeliye"
Buch starts "Opposition Ko..."
SRK:Seedhi Bhat
Buch:No Baqwaas. and then resigns.


Di Caprio is planning a new Catch Me if you can film featuring Ganguly and other KKR players in the movie.The protagonist though is going to be played by a Cricket Ball!!!

Ganguly is so desperate to improve his agility in the field,that he is in talks with an ayurvedic baba to feed him Kuruvi Lekiyam.

SRK meanwhile reveals that the Fake IPL Player blog was Buch and his truckload of specialists way of increasing the competitiveness in the team.

Hope it was good..more when i think of them.

The Chelsea Debacle

I was riled a lot yesterday night.Mostly because of some of the most abject refreeing i have ever seen and partly because Chelsea dint show a lot of brains yesterday.Barca had trounced Madrid three days back and i wanted some blood to be spilt.Chelsea began decently,Essien scoring with a tremendous volley to give Chelsea the advatnage.After that Chelsea predictably went to a counter attack mode.Drogba had atleast three oppurtunities to kill the game off but dint.Two clear cut penalties-the body check on Malouda and the Abidal shirt pull/Kick incident were denied to Chelsea.Abidal should have been sent off for this challenge but wasnt.

Story was the same in the second half,Chelsea sitting back to counter attack and Barcelona hardly mustered a decent shot.Messi was completely anonymous and so was Eto.Alves looked like a joke all night running around like a headless chicken and couldnt get one decent cross in.Iniesta was the only one who looked capable of anything.

Meanwhile Chelsea wasted some more oppurtunities to kill the match off and then Abidal was then sent off for a rather lame dive by Anelka,who i thought should have taken the chance to score.But Chelsea still choose to sit back against 10 men and allowed Barcelona to come at them.A Pique handball that happened 5 yards from the ref was also waved off.By now i was really afraid that Barca were going to convert one of their raids into a goal with so many penalties being waved off.Another chance fell to Belleti and he dutifully smashed it wide.Pique started to make runs into the chelsea half regularly!!!! and one such fell to Xavi,the ball was cleared by terry but essien made a hash of the clearance.Messi then picked out iniesta who broke the hearts of Chelsea fan.Chelsea were freaking pissed now and they threw themselves at the other end.A Ballack shot seemed to hit Eto on the hand and in my opinion his hand was clearly raised and must have been a penalty but again it was waved off.

After the whistle almost all Chelsea players barracked the ref but things got ugly when Drogba got involved.He did some Rama Rama Karam Podu dances around the ref and publically denounced him to be a fucking disgrace.The Ref meanwhile did what anyone would do facing a mad bull - run for your life.Drogba wasnt satisfied and continued to barrack him into the tunnel.Terry,Hiddink and Malouda tried to stop him but to no avail.

Barca for all their fabled talent mustered two shots on goal over two legs and were proved to be despicable hypocrites.All their cries of ref bias in the previous leg[which i dont completely agree with] probably influenced the ref today.The ref was some unknown from Norway so claims of a Platini interest in the match might not be completely ruled out.

As for the purist argument,Barca was shit today and dint show anything that proved them better footballers than Chelsea who had a gameplan and sticked to it.They wanted to win the match and no one can blame them for their gameplan.If Barca are so good as is claimed they should have proved it tonight,but they did not so i dont understand how they "deserve" more.I cant believe how much luck goes the Barca way,they won in 2006 by pure luck and now another oppurtunity obtained by luck and Pep had the temerity to speak of honesty.

Close Encounters Of The F****** Kind

Inspired by the undaunted efforts of navin,i decided to call up the admissions office of IIM-L today.Here's a brief transcript of what followed.The characters involved are Moi,Operator(appu),Admissions Officer(AO)

Moi:Hello Sir,can you connect me to the admissions office please.
appu:Kya?
Moi(slightly tensed):Admissions office please?
appu:kya bol rahe ho?

Realisation dawned on me that this was Mulayam's home town,so switched to the vernacular.

Moi:Kya me admissions office se bat kar sakta hoon
appu(satisfied with my hinglish) connects me to admissions office.

AO:hello?
Has anyone noticed that irrespective of the mother tongue everyone uses hello when responding to a phone call?anyways
Moi:IIM-L ka revised list kab release hoga?
AO:revised list kya hota he?
Moi:stunned silence
AO:hmm kya tu waitlist puch rahe ho
Moi was irritated now.Waitlist is something you release with the first admission list,now you relese a revised list based on the acceptance of offers.
Moi:han..woh kab ayega
AO:Pata nahi...woh ayega magar confirmed kuch nahi bata sakta hoon
Moi[What???]:Waitlist ayega ki sab seats fill hogaya?
AO:Pata nahi..Dean admissions nehi he...Pata nahi kab list niklega

I was really irritated by now and one of my split personalities,the one with a really foul mouth and derives immense pleasure by accusing someone of all kinds of incestous relationships in a variety of languages,was threating to burst out.So in order not to jeopardise the teny tiny possibility that i can escape this mind numbing job i thanked the guy and ended the call.

On Advertisements

Me and my usual hangouts [read psyche,navin,pradeep] were having a discussion yesterday on whether the strategy break introduced in IPL to introduce more ad time actually makes any impact as most people either flip channels or take a piss break etc as they know for sure that in the next 8 odd mins nothings gonna happen.So the actual ratio of those who watch the match and those who watch the ad would be pretty dismal.

This can be true for any ad break,as people mostly start flipping when the ad break starts.So this leads to the question if tv advertising actually makes any impact.The answer might be if done right then definitely yes.An excellent example would be the vodafone cartoon ads made for the IPL season.I want to catch the new ones every day and Vodafone get excellent exposure for the money they pay.Similar examples would be Hero Honda-Roadies or CenterFresh-Roadies ads.Smart placements good return on investment.

But this further led me to think whether all these ads actually make me shell out money[the primary purpose of any ad].Lets cover my expenditure and how i decide on what to spend on.I use airtel mobile because an airtel connection was offered to me the day i joined my company and not because of Rahman's tune or Vidya Balan or Madavan or SRK.The clothes i wear are mostly bought during discount sales and are chosen on my mood at that moment.The shoes i wear fall in the same category.The investment i make is chosen from the kind of returns the mutual funds have given historically.The stocks i buy based on their valuation and bottom lines.The restaurants i eat at are mostly chosen for convenience and taste.

Countering the above argument the brand value and the perception of the product built over time does influence a guy to buy something.Nike,Adidas et all spend so much money sponsoring teams and players because they add the extra zing to their products.Similar the macho ads of Bajaj Pulsar make it the bike of choice for youngsters and the JagoRe ads did influence people to vote[excluding lazy buggers like me].

So is an ad effective or not? i dont know for sure.But what is evident is that an ad made and placed smartly is whats important rather than pay exorbitant amounts to superstars.

Best Buys EPL 08-09

1.Guus Hiddink
He was "bought" in to save a sinking ship.Chelsea were 4th in the league and a lot of players had lost confidence in themselves and Scolari.They look like world beaters now.Enough Said.

2.Arshavin
Again bought when the team was in a hole playing some serious shit football drawing 0-0 everywhere.Can play anywhere in the midfield or forward.Scores goals,creates them.Near unstoppable when on song[as we found out yesterday :-( .Next year should be interesting with him on board from the beginning.

3.Geovanni
Brought in on a free transfer,he was central to the run that took Hull to the sky in the beginning of the season.Scored some screamers and created some more.Was great fun while it lasted.

4.Abdoulayye Faye
Newcastle sold him after he was involved in a bust up with NZogbia.End result? Newcastle are 19th while Stoke are very close to safety.Has been a great defender throwing himself at everything and scoring goals too.Has been a rock at the back all season.

5.James Beattie
Came into Stoke at January when they having a problem scoring goals.Scored enough to keep them in the Premier League.

6.Brad Friedal
With Laursen,Young and Barry the spine that were challenging the Fanstastic Four.Pity the team faded away in the second half of the season.

7.Shay Given
Easily the best goal keeper in the league.Bought in for a pittance when compared to the 10m payed for Bridge.Has been making 2-3 great saves every match.Might be the reason[along with Ireland] ManCity stay up.

8.Albert Riera
Liverpool badly needed some pace and skill in the left midfield section.This man has it and has plenty of it.Has been good most of the times,though badly underrated.

9.Fellani
What a buy!!!!The guy brought back the 80's hairstyle.Much of the season Everton were able to play without a striker because of his and Cahill's aerial abilities.Very strong,great in the air,good technical skills.Super Buy.

10.Amir Zaki
The on-loan signee at Wigan was once the leading scorer in the charts and was being compared to Shearer.Not a bad return 10 goals from 25 appearances.Hampered by injuries and the loss of Palacios to Spurs in January.

11.Sebastian Bassong
The only bright light in Newcastle's season.Superb defender.Expect him to move to one of the big clubs in the summer.

that's it.comments/brickbats welcome.